Cue the outrage:

Salam Elmenyawi of the Muslim Council of Montreal is prepared to challenge the new policy in court on the grounds it tramples on religious rights.

“What is the problem the Quebec government wants to fix?” Mr. Elmenyawi asked. “Are we going to have to stop teaching some of the moral values, like loving your parents, which are emphasized from a religious point of view?”

Yes, we all have to be taught to love our parents. As a godless heathen, it is all I can do to control my urges to rape, steal, murder, and burn everything to the ground. I guess the concept of laws, along with a common sense of ethics developed through centuries of an evolving social contract, isn’t worth squat when we have the threat of Eternal Damnation (™) to keep us all in line.

According to the holier-than-thou types, religion provides a shining example of how to lead a morally righteous life. This, I guess, despite it being used as a means of war, oppression, terrorism, sexual abuse, and deception by many of its leaders and proponents. Yes, if we truly want to unite the world in peace and brotherhood, religion is obviously the way to go.

Teach your kids how to abandon rational thought and submit to religious authorities at home, Mr. Elmenyawi. On your dime.

Forget about teaching kids “religious” morals. Maybe someone should teach some religiously-minded adults that it’s not okay to beat and kill their own wives, sisters, and daughters. Like this asshole, this asshole, and these “alleged” assholes. But I guess they never picked up any of that deranged thinking from their religious brain-washing factories, did they?

(So-called “honour killings” are not limited to Muslims or any other religious or “caste” group. But they do seem particularly good at it.)

Religion, much like a crazy uncle who can’t keep his pants on in public, belongs at home, not in a publicly funded school or institution. The rest of us are trying to move this little species of ours forward, not back to the ignorant Dark Ages of the mystical sand-cults.

Bon décision, Quebec.

Since then I’ve read many of his books and articles and was often entertained (as well as informed) as he made the rounds on The Daily Show, Politically Incorrect, Real Time with Bill Maher, and other talk shows. Hitchens, often swirling a scotch either backstage or right out in the open, was the type of opinionated asshole I love: one who know what he is talking about and who suffers ignorance poorly.

Hitchens is well-known for his atheism and contrarian views. He actually wrote a book called God Is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything, which should be mandatory reading in every high school. But now he has recently been diagnosed with throat cancer, which he has written about here. Needless to say, some of the Christian folk have been wondering aloud, if not stating outright, that his plight might be some sort of punishment for his outspoken criticism of organized religion and the people who adhere to its ancient superstitions.

From biblearchaeology.org:

“It is not our place as Christians to say the specific reasons why Mr. Hitchens has contracted this disease. We only know that God often uses illness as a means to bring people to repentance and faith.”

It might also be the decades of alcoholism and smoking  that led to his cancer (as well as a possible genetic predisposition—Hitchens’ father also died of throat cancer). But hey, I guess no one who led a good decent Christian life ever got a disease or experienced any personal misfortunes. Look out atheists and non-believers (including those who worship the wrong gods). God has a bullet for you, too, if you don’t keep your mouth shut.

This type of thinking is so stupid and crazy it just boggles the mind. If your idea of a “loving” God is a petty, jealous asshole who dispenses horrible suffering on those who merely seek to better understand this world and their place in it—and let’s face it, that’s exactly the type of God you worship—then there is only one thing to say: F–k you and your God. I’d rather be struck dead than suffer the cruel whims of some spoiled brat deity.

I hope Hitchens is able to beat his cancer. If he does, it will be a testament to his personal will and the “miracle” of modern medical treatment, not God doing an “aw shucks, I was just messin’ with ya, man.” Get well soon, Hitch.

Though the Roman Catholic organization attracts many decent and morally-abiding people to its professions, it is also attractive to those who are harboring certain sexual tendencies, such as those with an unhealthy interest in children. It’s not a stretch to wonder if Lahey’s own feelings of guilt and self-loathing might have played a part in reaching the agreement with abuse survivors.

For centuries, the priesthood has been a safe hiding place for men confused or disturbed by their developing sexuality. Perhaps they feel that by burying themselves in celibacy and “service to God” that they will overcome what, to them, are highly disturbing thoughts and desires. After all, no one will question a priest as to why he is not married or without a girlfriend. Yet the desires never completely go away and combined with easy access and the ability to psychologically manipulate and intimidate followers, it’s inevitable that slip-ups will occur.

The Roman Catholic organization has always known this, has always made it easy for offenders to slip in and out of parishes and dioceses, has always left a wake of abused and traumatized children wherever it sets its claws. So why the surprise that yet another of its ranks has fallen to these kinds of accusations?

Letting priests marry will solve nothing. A pedophile is a pedophile; gay or straight, married or single, it makes no difference. Pedophiles are attracted to the Roman Catholic Church because it provides them a safe haven to prey on victims. When they get caught they are simply moved somewhere else and the files get buried or vanish entirely. Or, if there is publicity, victims are paid off.

Either way, the practice has been widespread for centuries and the highest-ranking church officials right up to the Pope have always been aware of it. It’s only been in relatively recent times that the Church has been confronted with any type of consequences from the crimes it has perpetrated. Before that, it was open season on children (and anyone else) with complete impunity.

So no, I’m not shocked that ex-Bishop Lahey was allegedly found with a laptop full of child porn. What shocks me is that people still willingly support and endorse this long obsolete and abhorrent institution, this organization that feeds on guilt, ignorance, and fear, this unrepentant and remorseless destroyer of children. That’s what really shocks and surprises me. Who can take this organization seriously anymore? Who really thinks that they have any interest in anything other than the pursuit and protection of their own wealth and power?

The ad campaign is sponsored by the Freethought Association of Canada , which is raising funds for it through their Atheist Bus website.

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The crowd was mostly made up of children and young teens and they were listening  to a clean-cut young fellow who looked to be in his early twenties. As soon as we were within earshot I heard him say “Jesus” and I knew this was some sort of religious service or something.

We didn’t stay long, just long enough to slowly walk by and hear a little bit of what he was saying. He told them there are two places they can go when they die: Heaven or Hell. Those who accept Jesus Christ will go to Heaven and those who don’t will roast in the fires of Hell. The expressions on their faces said it all: wide-eyed, fearful, completely enthralled by what he was saying.

It always disappoints me to see this sort of thing. We live in a society where access to scientific and historical knowledge is the best it’s ever been. We have libraries in every town and the internet in almost every home. And yet, in this so-called advanced day and age, children are still being sat down on lawns and given these ancient fables as “truth”. Why?

Children are easy to recruit into superstitious belief systems. They arrive with a clean slate and rely on adults to teach them about the world. That’s why religious groups start the indoctrination process early on, beginning with baptism and Sunday school. The earlier the seeds are planted, the deeper the roots become. And as the years go by, they are often more and more difficult to pull out.

Fear has always been used as a tool to control people. Sometimes fears are legitimate, like the fear of getting shot in a war zone or that Wham! will reunite and put out a new album. But when the fears being propagated are nothing more than nightmarish illusions dreamed up to frighten young children into mental slavery, it makes it even sadder to see young minds being abused by adults who should know better.

I haven’t read these books, but if Pullman is an atheist and uses his stories to warn against religious tyranny, they can’t be all bad. The buzz on the movie isn’t very good, but I’ll probably end up checking it out, along with all the others who will be buying books and tickets to see what all the fuss is about. I’m sure Pullman is writing a “thank you” note to these groups for providing him with so much free publicity.

Apparently, the Church is not satisfied with ruining its own image with rampant corruption, deception, and centuries of sanctioned pedophilia. Now it seeks to further denigrate its integrity with bullshit protests against childrens fantasy books. Well, if the Catholic groups know about anything, they certainly know about books of fantasy. And children. Especially soft and supple doe-eyed children who know how to keep secrets…

This sad attempt to “protect” children is laughable given the history of predatory priests being shuffled around from church to church. But then again, those priests weren’t writing fables that posit the idea God doesn’t exist; they were only confirming it each time they reached into a child’s pants. Looking to the Catholic Church to protect children is like asking a dog to guard a steak.

In a properly advanced society, no school board would be subject to the whims of organized religion. But Catholic School Boards will continue to try and hide the truth about this world from their students, and thousands of parents will willingly send their kids to be molded by these institutions into good, God-fearing, guilt-stricken, anxiety-ridden, intellectually-impaired adults — something the public school system already does well enough.

When the Church is able to clean it’s own yard, maybe then people will take their criticisms seriously. That is, if we can get past the funny hats. But for now they will continue to grapple with their weakening grip on the minds of those they seek to control and watch helplessly as their credibility and relevance continue to decline.

No word on a Muslim “Ken” doll, but they are planning to release a “protective brother” some time next year. He would, of course, come complete with his own pair of clitoral clippers and a small can of gasoline for dousing Fulla should she ever disgrace him by showing her face in public, speaking before being spoken to, or having the audacity to be raped.

Pet store owner: Satan’s image on turtle’s shell (CNN)

The owner of the pet store, who I assume to be a decent fellow with at least half of a functioning brain, gives us this explanation:

“The marking on the shell was like the devil wanted us to know he was down there,” Bryan Dora said. “To me, it’s too coincidental that the only thing to come out unscathed would have this image on it.’”

Ah, of course. Satan was just down there pacing in hell, wringing his hands in frustration, wondering how he could best let us know he was still a threat capable of wreaking evil havoc in the world. What better way to remind us of what a badass he is than by emblazoning his blurry likeness onto the back of a pet-store turtle?

I might have thought that the recent school shootings in Minnesota would be a better example. Or maybe the corpse lined streets of Baghdad. Or maybe the abduction, rape and brutal murder of an innocent 9 year old girl in Florida. But nah, that’s childplay compared to this. It’s a friggin’ turtle, man! (shudder)

Someone should tell Mr. Dora there is also a boogieman under his bed who might grab his feet if they slip outside the covers.

Bullshit.

Human beings have been overcoming adversity for as long as we’ve been on this planet. We’ve done it through intelligence, hard work, and the sheer instinctual will to survive and improve the conditions of our lives. Prayer, by itself, has never helped anyone.

But a community of humans, bonded by compassion and love for their fellow human beings, can feed the hungry, shelter the homeless, and work together to build a better world. A human being in tune with their gifts can paint a masterpiece, compose the most beautiful music, or throw the winning pass for a touchdown. A single human being can change the entire world.

As nice as it might sound to true believers, God isn’t helping anyone to win Grammy awards or football games. Nor is he on the beaches of Thailand, India, Sri Lanka or Indonesia, rushing food and medical aid to the multitudes of tsunami victims.

People need to give credit to their own strength and resolve. YOU pulled yourself through. YOU found the will to continue. YOU did all the work and made it happen. All the prayer in the world will not rebuild shattered homes, restore ruined roads, or lift the hopes of a despondent and weary people.

Those of us in the humanist community know it is up to us, as commonly united citizens of the planet, to make things happen. We have to cure our sicknesss and disease; we have to put an end to wars and famine; we have to make this earthly home safe and prosperous for future generations.

Because let’s face it—God has never been interested in the job.